Lost Signal?

“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.” - Gandhi

Prayer. A part in my life that I am trying to improve. Praying to God when I wake up thanking him for another day of life that he has so willingly given to someone like me. Praying for forgiveness for the wrongs I commit daily. Praying to be guided down the right path. Praying for His love to be strong through the thunder clouds around me. All this in a 5 or so minute prayer. So little time that I give. 

I was on the site "Land of Broken Hearts" reading the latest post on my all time favorite band that just manages to connect to me in the majority of their songs; while reading i scrolled down to read any comments. I found one by this girl and it was the very first one I believe. I don't know why but I felt this need to click on her name that lead to a link. It lead to her blog on this site. As I read it...it was...captivating...It was about prayer..how we need to have that 1-on-1 with the Big Man. I was just giving the Big Man that on the go prayer and not taking some of my time to actually talk to him about everything that bothers me. I was always saying to myself how I would eventually get around to having that 1-on-1. I kept postponing that, letting other things get in the way...

I no longer wanted to postpone that 1-on1....I used to give an hour or more to him...I was on fire once...on fire....and I let so many things get in the way....from time to time I would give more than just 5 mins...but only when I was so in need...I was wrong to do that in just those moments...I had begun to doubt...to walk away from the eternal life that was promised to me...I threw it all away...and yet even now...He had just called me and told me to come back, that he'd forgive me....even when I was unfaithful to him he was leading me back....

"Hear, O Lord, my righteous plea; listen to my cry. Give ear to my prayer...." Pslam 17:1

I didn't pray right away..,I decided to listen to my all time favorite band...Home by Switchfoot...I just was overcome with this need to talk to him and have that 1-on-1 right away..so I did..although...it was 5 mins...I was interrupted and I lost the will to pray. Honestly I was. After that I had to leave the sanctuary of my room to take care of the tasks at hand. Now I'm back. I've set myself a task to return to that place, the place where everything is made right, the place where I can have my 1-on-1 with the Big Man. I think we all come across this point in our life. Where we just stop with the communication with Him. Whatever it may have been that kept us from that 1-on-1 we end up just losing that communication, we're in an area in our life where there is no reception no full bars just a lost signal. We're lost without him. We need to call him to be find our way. To find our way out of this world that doesn't hold our interests, our hearts, our life, our soul.  So now...I'm gonna end this hear...and I'm gonna give him that call...and have that 1-on-1 that is so desperately needed in me. 


"Grant that I may not pray alone with the mouth; help me that I may pray from the depths of my heart" - Martin Luther